Random Thoughts

***"Fatigue" sounds like such a....benign word. It doesn't quite fit the mind-numbing, will-crushing exhaustion you get from MS, and which I am battling (not too successfully) now. It's also weird, to have days of fatigue, and then go through nights of insomnia. It's as if my body really wants to have a sleep disorder, but it just can't commit.

***For the first time since junior high, I can't get worked up over a presidental election. I don't know if it's the beforementioned fatigue, or it's just a growing cynicism (due, in part, to a president being "selected" rather than elected not too long ago), or what have you. I just can't get excited over any of the candidates. Maybe once the race is in full swing, with candidates nominated and vice-presidential hopefulls named, I'll get more in the spirit of things.

***My cat is lonely. That's the vet's verdict: the cat was used to being in a multicat household, and that's why he whines at night after we've all hit the hay and won't stop until someone gets up and pets him for a while. So, we've begun the process of getting an additional cat. Which, for us, means scoping out the Humane Society's website for a few weeks, making a list of feline contenders, and then heading out waaaaaaaaay across town to the shelter. We've never had more than one cat at a time. My mother always had multiple cats, and my godmother...well, let's say she has a lot of cats. And by "a lot," I mean somewhere around thirty or so. No, I'm not kidding. I have no desire to have a house full of cats like that, but I also would rather not have the cat mewing all night, waking the kids, either. The things I'll do for my cat's emotional wellbeing...

***I have a doctor's appointment next Tuesday, and I've made a decision. I am tired of every month, having these huge, ridiculous prescription calamities. Last month's was the worst. I am supposed to get my pain pills on the first of the month. I didn't get them until almost the FIFTEENTH. Which may be why I'm having sleep issues. Anyhoo, on to my decision: I'm asking for a referral to the pain clinic. I like Dr. Fetus, and under his care I've had a better track record with the pain than I have in nearly 12 years of MS. I was not in the hospital even one time for entire YEAR, thanks to him. And for me, that is damn close to a miracle. But the only way to continue to keep my pain under control is by taking my meds regularly and having meds for pain breakthroughs. That isn't happening, and it's getting worse all the time. I think it's time to cope with the specialists in the matter. I'm also interested in trying subdermal patches, which I have read a great deal about. The only ones who'll do that are the pain clinic. So hi ho, hi ho, it's off to the pain clinic I go...

***I recently discovered that Dr. Pepper, in conservative amounts, actually seems to help with my nausea. Who knew?

***Jonathan and I have become addicted to two new shows. One we expected to like (BBC's "The Restaurant"), and the other? It's weird. I never would've thought I'd like this particular show, but I not only like it, I'm text-messaging votes in every week. No, I'm not talking about "American Idol," (which, thanks to having an 11-year-old daughter, I already know far too much about...she's a fan of Amanda, who she never refers to by name, instead always calling her "the rock-and-roll nurse"). Nope, it's not "American Idol," but it does share something in common with it: Randy Jackson. Yes, we've been watching MTV's "Randy Jackson Presents: America's Best Dance Crew." And yes, I know how bizarre that sounds. We don't like hip-hop (I'd never even heard of L'il Mama, one of the judges, before the show's premiere). We've never seen any of the so-called "battle dance" movies, nor do we want to. And the last time I saw any breakdancing, I was at a community center dance in 1985, baby-sitting my sister and watching the high-school kids with their red-leather Michael Jackson jackets do the worm to "The Freaks Come Out At Night." I'm at a loss to explain why we enjoy this show. We just do. I'm rooting for Kaba Modern, while Jonathan is a Jabberwakeez fan. All I can say about this is, life is weird and unpredictable, and so am I....

***I saw the video yesterday for the Oscar-winning song, "Falling Softly," from the movie "Once." I haven't seen the movie, but I want to. The song is so haunting and lovely. I must get that soundtrack...

***And finally: I had to change the message on my voice-mail the other day. It now says, "Hi, we're not available to take your call. Please leave a message and we'll get back to you as soon as we can. And please keep in mind: this is voice mail. This is NOT an answering machine. We CANNOT hear you while you leave a message. Thank you." Now, you'd think that this went without saying. Sadly, no. I made the change because five times in one day, from five DIFFERENT people (including two who have been to my home and KNOW I don't have an answering machine), I got messages that began with, "Hello? Angel? Jonthan? Can you pick up the phone? HELLO!" Now, I do realize that many people still use answering machines. But COME ON. Isn't the assumption these days that you are speaking to voice mail?

I hope everyone (especially those out East) is keeping nice and warm. Adieu for now.

---Angel

My Conversation With a Political Fundraiser

(ring, ring)
ME: Hello?
PF: Good morning. Is this Mrs. _______?
ME: Yes, may I ask who is calling?
PF: I am a volunteer with Barack Obama's campaign. Are you familiar with our candidate?
ME: Yes, I am.
PF: And you're registered in the state of Oregon as an independent voter, correct?
ME: Yes, but no fears...I've never voted for a Republican president.
(PF laughs)
(long pause)
PF: As I was saying, I'm with Barack Obama's campaign. Obamna is dedicated to election reform, and as such, does not accept donations from lobbies and so-called "special interest groups." As a result, he depends on contributions from private citizens to fund his campaign to be our nation's next President. How much would you be willing to donate to the election fund?
ME: It is possible that I might be willing to donate in the future...however, I have not decided upon a candidate to support at this time. I never make that determination until after the primaries are completed and a party winner is announced.
PF: Well, it is projected that Obama will win the Democratic primaries...
ME: I am well aware of that. This does not change the fact that he has NOT won them yet.
PF: Are you a supporter of Hillary Clinton?
(I sigh deeply)
ME: I just told you, I'm not a supporter of ANYONE yet.
(long pause)
PF: Barack Obama needs your support, and even if you have not decided upon him yet, could we still count on you for a financial donation at this time?
(longest pause yet)
ME: You didn't really think that would work, did you?
PF: Honestly? No. I didn't.
ME: Good. Have a nice day, ma'am.
PF: You, too.
(click)

Write Now: Childhood Books

Today's Write Now once again comes from the book, "Normal Is Just a Setting on the Dryer" by Adair Lara.

No Books Will Ever Be as Good as the Ones You Loved as a Child

Hmmm. I disagree with this one. I disagree, because in my experience, a true love of books is a love that never lets you down, no matter how old you get. I hope to still be reading and discovering new favorites up to and including the day I die. And I would hate to think that none of those new favorites could ever, no matter how well-written and beloved by yours truly, be able to compete with "Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret."

What I WILL agree with is the idea that a book, once loved in your childhood, will always hold a little space in your heart. That said, here are some of my own childhood faves:

"The Phantom Tollbooth" by Norton Juster. This is a fantasy book about a small, bored young man who travels on a small car through a toy tollbooth to the Kingdom of Wisdom, where he sets off on an adventure to rescue the princesses Rhyme and Reason. This book is full of silly puns and wonderful imagery, not to mention bad guys called the Demons of Ignorance. A so-so animated movie version was made by Chuck Jones in 1969. I would love to see a non-animated movie based on this book with today's special effects. It would have to be better than The Golden Compass, no?

"On Your Toes, Susie!" by Lee Wyndham. I came down with a terrible bout of the mumps in elementary school. I was miserable and frankly, bored. My mother scoured the local secondhand bookstore and found this tome for me. It's the story of a ballerina named Susie, who finds her place as number one in her ballet class in serious jeopardy when a little French girl named Mimi arrives. Mutual jealousy and competitiveness keeps these girls as rivals until both end up with the mumps...and both end up being nursed by Susie's mom. Of course, they end up being friends in the end. It's not that great of a story, but because of the sentimental value involved (how long did it take my mom to find a book about a girl my age with the mumps?), it will always be a favorite.

"Stories From Japan" by Edward W. Dolch. I don't remember how I first got ahold of a copy of this book. It seems it was always there, in my home, when I was a child. But once I began reading it, I couldn't put it down. It's a collection of stories of various ages of antiquity. The watercolor pictures are lovely, and the stories are gorgeous. One of my favorites is the first one in the book: "The Willow Tree," a story about the spirit of a willow tree and how she becomes a wife and mother before dying when the tree is cut down for the emperor's bridge. I was so much in love with this story, that I planned to name my first daughter Willow. (This was, of course, before I got married and discovered that Willow Mymarriedlastname did not sound good together....at all.) As I grew older, this book was somehow lost. I spend several years looking for it before I finally won a copy from eBay. It is now a favorite of my son's, and I hope, someday, it will be a favorite of a grandchild's as well.

"Beautiful Girl" by Elisabeth Ogilvie. I wanted to hate this story about a beautiful girl who gets nothing but tsuris for her looks...but it's so charming, I just couldn't. Besides, any book that starts with a precautionary tale about using the word 'persnickety' to your parents can't be all bad.

The Trixie Belden books by Julie Campbell et all. Some girls loved Nancy Drew, but she wasn't for me. I was a Trixie gal. My favorite of the series is "The Mystery At Saratoga," although "The Red Trailor Mystery" is a close second. (If you happen to be a die-hard fan, there is a Trixie Belden convention this year...go to http://www.heartofdixie.biz/TrixieCamp08/Registration.htm for more details. I almost want to go myself...not only is it Trixie, but it's being held in the Smokey Mountains, near to my own hometown. Which is a little odd, when you think about it...as these books actually take place in rural New York. But hey, it's fiction, and poetic license is allowed...)

There are several other books that I remember fondly...but not enough to actually run out and buy it. One was a series of books, if I remember correctly, about a girl who wants to be a trick rider and loves horses. I loved these books and can even remember one picture from it quite clearly...but the title escapes me. It's possible that only one book was about the trick riding, while the others were about life on a dude ranch. Sadly, I can't remember enough about them to know for sure. There are three other books for which I remember the title, but seem unable to find anything else on them. The first is "Circle of Love," a book about a young German Jewish girl named Anna, a Polish soldier named Anton, and how their lives intersect repeatedly and how WWII continues to affect their lives long after they have moved to America. Another is "Carol's Story," a tale about a young girl who survives physical and sexual abuse, alcoholic parents and the foster-care system to become the wife of a minister. It is a moving story, and if I remember correctly, it is a true story as well. I went through some of the same things Carol did, and just knowing that you can move on with your life was a message I really needed to hear. The last book is called "Roxanne." I think, technically, it's a romance novel, which I usually don't like. But for me, the romance aspect takes a back seat to the historical fiction at play. Roxanne is a young girl from a midwestern town in the late 1800's/early 1900's. She runs away to the east coast (I want to say Baltimore, but I'm not certain), marries a glovemaker and moves to the South (Georgia, I think), and then ends up in the Klondike during the Gold Rush there (where she dances for money and is called "Klondike Roxie"). Eventually, she finds stability and true love in San Francisco...right after the Earthquake. It's a story that has stuck with me, and I'd love to find it again. If you know anything about these titles, leave a message for me on this post or email me at Pendragon525@aol.com. I'll be eternally grateful.

Well, thanks for sticking with me for my second Write Now. Adios for now.

Write Now!

Lately, I haven't been keeping up with any of my blogs or writing in my novel. I am under a considerable amount of stress (marriage troubles, health problems, Dad's health is in the crapper, my best friend has a brain tumor and one of my closest friends has cancer), so it's not unexpected. But I do want to be able to write again, and break this lethargy.

I took a creative writing class in junior high, many, many years ago. The teacher would give us a proverb or quote or what have you, and we had to write about whatever came to mind after reading said proverb or quote or whatever. I hated doing it at the time, but now I am beginning to see the wisdom of it.

And so, I am going to start that writing exercise here on ZPT. My hope is that it will help break this writing slump I seem to be stuck in. You'll know the post is such an exercise, because I will title them "Write Now."

My first platitude is from the book Normal is Just a Setting on the Dryer by Adair Lara:

Bald Men Are Sexy


Bald men are sexy. Hmmm. I think it should read "SOME bald men are sexy." There's a big difference between Jason Alexander and Patrick Stewart. I think that in order for baldness to be sexy, the bald man has to be confident and he has to resist Bad Bald Guy Remedies. We all know what those are: the toupee. Hair plugs. The dreaded combover. The Caesar. Smelly lotions and creams. The silly tiny hat and bandana look (yes, Bret Michaels, I'm talking to you). Spray-on hair. These Bad Bald Guy Remedies actually make the men who use them LESS attractive. Which is a sad irony, as these men spend countless amounts of money to make themselves look good in spite of the baldness, when in reality, all they really needed to do was embrace their folically-challenged head and get some confidence and self-esteem. Just as the giant rhymes-with-Delores (Seinfeld reference) declared in South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut: "Chicks dig confidence." And we do.

So which bald men are, in fact, sexy? For me, the list has to begin with the super-yummy Christoper Meloni, of "Law & Order: SVU fame." Anyone else remember the episode in which he stripped down to his tiny blue underwear? (My, oh, my. If you missed it, well, thank goodness for YouTube for making that Bald Guy Sexy Moment available for Meloni fans to watch over and over and over again. Pour yourself a glass of your liquid refreshment of choice, turn down the lights and click here: Little Blue Briefs. Enjoy!) Meloni is bald and sexy because he presents himself with a great deal of confidence, courage and that little twinkle to the eye that says, "Try Meloni and you'll never go back." Women are suckers for that twinkle. I married the man who twinkled like that at me....Even Meloni's turn as the boil-covered Freakshow in Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle didn't dimish his sexiness. A less-than-confident bald guy would balk at taking on such a role. Meloni not only took the role, he obviously had a great time. You've got to respect a man who is willing to play ugly and have fun doing it. But it's his role on SVU as the tempermental Detective Stabler that really brings out the tiger in the bald man. It brings out another side as well: the family man who loves his kids. And there are few among us who can resist THAT!

Another Bald & Beautiful man is LL Cool J. Now, most of my close friends are probably saying: "What? Are you serious?" This is because I have often, and loudly, expressed my opinion about men who are too cut, particularly men who have six-packs. I know most women find big muscles and six-packs very appealing, but in general, I do not. Six-packs look to me like tumors under the skin. It is just not attractive to me in the least. I always think of the old television show "V," when the woman had the alien baby. Not my thing. Now, I don't mind a few muscles or a man who is a little toned. That can be quite nice. But when a man has worked out so much, the veins are sticking up and out of his arms and even worse, his neck....he's lost me as an admirer. I find it unnatural and repulsive.

But there is always one exception to every rule, and the exception to my "no muscle-bound alien guys" rule is LL Cool J. He's got the best example of bedroom eyes I've ever seen. When he kisses his fingertips and makes the peace sign, it's enough to make any woman melt. And that voice! I am a sucker for voices. Most women say they notice a man's eyes first, but for me, it's the voice. A sexy voice goes a long way in my lexicon. And LL Cool J definately has that sultry, girl-I'm-gonna-make-you-scream-like-a-banshee-on-Spanish-fly voice. If you need proof, check out the soundtrack for the movie Beavis and Butt-Head Do America for his cover of Chaka Khan's "Ain't Nobody": "I'm the best when it comes to making love all night...you can take it, girl." Makes you want to take him up on the offer, doesn't it? Even his name is sexy: LL Cool J stands for "Ladies Love Cool James." On anyone else, it would smack of hubris. On LL, it's just the honest truth.

Next on my list would have to be the before-mentioned Patrick Stewart. This is another case of a bald man with a lot of confidence and a sexy voice to boot. Ah, that accent. And speaking of Beavis and Butt-head, Stewart is a big fan and reportedly has one of the largest B&B memorabilia collections on record. You've got to love a man who is sexy and has a great sense of humor. Make it so, baby. Make it so.

Here are a few honorable mentions:

Now I certainly cannot leave out Montel Williams. The talk show host and I disagree on many MS-related issues, but there is no denying that Montell is one good-lookin' man. It's also nice to see a public figure with MS still working, still sexy. Gives us all hope. Someone who practically embodies the "bald is beautiful" ideal is Taye Diggs. Who didn't do a double-take the first time they saw him? Seal is also a hairless adonis, a fact that led to his current career of impregnating supermodel Heidi Klum ("nice work if you can get it," says my husband). Another sexy man with little hair but a great voice is the great actor Sean Connery. Like a fine wine, that man just improves with age. Another "Star Trek" bald hottie is Avery Brooks (also of "Spencer: For Hire" fame). I'll visit Deep Space Nine any day for a glimpse of him. Ed Kowalczyk of the band Live deserves a mention for his lack of hair but certainly no lack of sex appeal. And finally, tennis-playing hot-head Andre Agassi (insert tasteless but still funny tennis balls joke here).

Bald men are sexy. Yes, Ms. Lara....they certainly are.

Some links:

Ten Hot Bald Celebrities

Bald Men are Hot! article and poll results

Bald R Us website
This is a support site for bald men and the women who love them...the page I linked you to above includes a great post on all the fun things you can do with a bald head. This is a great website, definately worth checking out.

Why I've Been Gone

I know I've been MIA for quite some time, but I have two pretty good excuses.

One, my husband had an accident with the car. Notice I don't say "car accident," which would imply the car was in some kind of motion at the time. No, instead, my husband heard a funny noise coming from the car when he turned it on in the driveway, and decided to pop the hood and check it out...while the motor was still running. Not the smartest move. Some belt or other (I know very little about the inner workings of cars and am quite happy that way) snapped, hit him in the head, and knocked him down flat. When he came to, he wobbled up and fell head-first into the car. So that was three head wounds: two on the forehead, one in the back. It was the one in the back that was serious. There was literally a pool of blood in my driveway. Ruth & Paul (God was looking out for me when I somehow managed to make these two my friends) rushed over, and we rushed to the ER. Long story short: bad concussion, seven staples, bed rest for about a week, massive painkillers. I can assure you, he's never going to open the hood of a running car ever again.

In a way, though, it had a positive effect. We got to walk in the other's shoes for a little while, and it was definately eye-opening and led to some really good conversations.

Reason number two: my kids got a head cold, and so did I. Their cold lasted about three days...mine turned into pneumonia. I'm still wrestling with it, but I am getting better. Luckily, Dr. Fetus came to the rescue with a huge bottle of that nasty cough syrup that worked so well when I had bronchitis last year. Necessary, naturally, because coughing aggrivates the trigeminal neuralgia. Fortunately, that hasn't been much of a problem until today, and I'm responding well to my meds. Bed rest is boring the ever-loving shit out of me...

Anyhoo, I hope to be around more in the coming weeks. For those who celebrated a holiday yesterday, I hope it was a good one.



Ciao,

Angel

Bad Blogger! Bad Blogger!

Yes, I've been a bad little blogger, not updating in oh so long. What can I say, summer sucks.

And speaking of summer....why is it still OVER 90 DEGREES?!?!? It's freaking SEPTEMBER, people! Did I offend Mother Nature or something, that petty little bitch?

Health update: still having trouble with nausea. I had to go into the doctor's office again for a shot...only this time, just Phenergan and no pain meds. It worked like a charm! From now on, I am going to try just nausea meds first to see if that takes care of the problem without the need for opiates. My right leg is also a big issue lately, and the pain and spasms are much worse than they ever have been before. I am having a great deal of difficulty walking. My muscles have spasmed so very much, they are actually swollen in places, making my legs look lumpy and misshappen. Not a pretty sight.

I have, however, managed to get out and see three movies in the past few months. The first was "The Simpsons." This was Eden's first movie, and she behaved extremely well. She was completely mesmerized. At one point, she said to me, "That a big TV!" Otherwise, she was totally silent. Who knew? As for the movie itself, I enjoyed it. It is like a longer episode, with some liberties taken insofar as censoring goes. I would definately recommend it. Stay for the credits...you won't be disappointed.

The second film was "Hairspray." Now, I am a big John Waters fan. I loved the original, and while I have not yet seen the musical stage version, I do have the cast recording and enjoy it. My view? It was an enjoyable movie, but there were things that I definately didn't like about it.

The cons: first and foremost, John Travolta. Wow, is he one hideous woman. I never noticed that he had such beady little eyes before. I thought his attempt to play it "straight" rather than campy was ill-advised for this material, and I absolutely did not believe that "she" was in love with her husband, nor he with her, not for one moment. Zero chemistry between Travolta and Christopher Walken. This is unfortunate, as this movie seemed to be the "Edna Turnblad story" rather than the "Tracy Turnblad story," my biggest gripe about the film. And the moments when Travolta's well-padded ass was either shaking or being slapped was stomach-turningly bad. I was also disappointed by how little the Corny Collins show and cast mattered in this film, especially as compared to the original. Three big changes from either the film or stage version to this one were especially bothersome: one, the idea that Link was more concerned with his showbiz career than with civil rights; two, that Tracy ran from the police rather than standing firm and getting arrested for her beliefs; and three, the practically non-existant "nicest kids in town," the Corny Collins Council. I also found it incredible that Velma went from being a pushy stage mom in the original to a station manager in this version. I'm sorry, but this was the early 60's. How many women were station managers or show producers at that time? There aren't nearly enough NOW. That change is just unnecessary for me...Travolta could've done quite well as Divine did, playing both Edna and the station manager as needed. Now, I'm a fan of the late Divine and did mourn her loss in this film...so maybe I am judging Travolta harshly. Nah. Amanda Bynes did a lukewarm (at best) job of the "checkerboard chick," Penny, and Christopher Walken's dancing and singing was almost visibly painful at times. I also think Velma was better off with a husband, as in the original...I mean, come on...not only is she a single mother but she's a powerful tv executive...in the pre-Beatles sixties? Exactly how realistic is THAT? But the aspect I probably missed most was the camp of the original, the comedy of it mixed in with a serious message. This movie focused way too much on the marriage of Edna and Wilbur, and not enough by far on Tracy, the Corny Collins show and the issue of civil rights....and the DANCING!

The pros: I just LOVED seeing John Waters as the flasher in the opening scene, "Good Morning Baltimore." A great way to kick off the movie for those of us who are fans of the original. Queen Latifah did another great turn in this film, after having impressed me as Mama Morton in "Chicago" a few years back. And she had some big shoes to fill, as the original was the late, great Ruth Brown. I think she did Ruth proud. I was also impressed by Elijah Kelley, who did a fantastic job with Seaweed. And while Nikki Blonsky was no Marissa Janet Winokur, she more than held her own and did a good job of portraying Tracy's confidence in both her size and her beliefs. And kudos all around for Taylor Parks, the most adorable L'il Inez imaginable. I hope casting directors are paying attention, because this girl has potential. The sets on this film were terrific, probably outdoing the original in this aspect. You really got a feel for the early-60's Baltimore. The costume designers and make-up artists also did a great job. Here's hoping they are rewarded with a nomination when Oscar comes calling.

The third film I have seen recently is "Superbad." Now, this movie is probably not going to beckon to Oscar. But it is absolutely HILARIOUS. It definately has the feel of 80's-era teen films like "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" and "Fast Times At Ridgemont High." It's not arty or cerebral in any sense of the word, but it's so much fun that I am not surprised at the critics who are calling it a guilty pleasure. Don't feel guilty, guys. Just embrace your inner McLovin. This is another film you are going to want to stay in your seats for the credits, by the way, so don't be in a rush for the exit signs. My only gripe is that the ending felt a little contrived...sort of like you can almost hear the producers saying, "Crap, the original ending didn't test well...how quick can we slap on a feel-good, everything-is-great moment on the end of this?" But otherwise, this is a great film. I've even seen it twice (once on opening night, in a full house), as I rarely do with a movie. I might even see it a third time. ;-)

Anyhoo, that's about all that's going on for now. I am hoping this heat wave will break soon and I will be posting more in the near future, here and on "Bad Baby Names." TTFN.

Feeling Sorry...For Predators?

A quote from an article in the 8/09/07 issue of "Rolling Stone" magazine, dealing with the "Dateline: To Catch a Predator" show:


"I searched for more than a hundred men busted by Perverted Justice (the group that aides the Dateline program) and found only eleven of them with listed numbers, all of whom were terrified---worried about being evicted from their homes, losing their jobs, even becoming targets of random violence...they were still worried about who was watching them...A divorced father of two started to weep: 'I love Dunkin' Donuts, but I won't go in anymore. I'm so scared of the first encounter with someone I know who has seen me on tv.'"


Am I the only one reading this and thinking, "Boo fucking hoo"?